The Group: Seven Widowed Fathers Reimagine Life

As a certified grief counselor trained at Columbia University’s Center for Complicated Grief, I was looking forward to attending a workshop given by Donald Rosenstein and Justin Yopp on their work with a men’s support group of widowed fathers. The workshop was superlative, andThe Group is one of the best books on grief that I have ever read. It is riveting.What began as a six-month trial support group evolved into a three year group of 7 fathers who helped each other through the grief work and transition they needed to get their lives back on track. Grief is not something we do well alone, and these men were (of course) at first hesitant to share with each other. Eventually, they helped each other navigate the work of being the sole parent, dealing with their children’s grief process, and eventually even the daunting thought of dating again.Being a widowed father is a difficult role, one that is so eloquently depicted in this book. One man had to tell his three young children that their mother had died the night before – the two older ones were very said, and the youngest one asked what was for breakfast!What I loved most about The Group is that it did not read like a textbook or a “How-To” or “Self -Help” book. It read like a novel, and one that was galvanizing and hard-to-put-down. The reader felt they personally got to know each of the characters and their situations and stories.I recommend The Group to anyone who works in the grief profession – or anyone who knows someone who has lost a loved one – which would probably be 100% of us. It details the path grief takes and how one needs to adapt and integrate the loss into one’s life. Rosenstein and Yopp have captured the process with emotion and raw honesty while also showing the power and ability of those “in the same boat” able to help each other navigate the choppy waters of grief. They reinforce the important concept that the grief will always be there, but over time, with the proper help and guidance, it changes and eventually we can go on and envision a life filled with happiness and joy once again. The loved one we lost finds a new place in our heart.THE GROUP IS A MUST READ FOR ANYONE WHO HAS BEEN TOUCHED BY GRIEF IN ANY WAY!

This book was fantastic on many levels. I say this as a physician, as a grief recovery specialist, but, most importantly, as also once being a widow with three young children.It is simply written, the flow is fantastic, and the book is easy to read. It was so riveting that I put it down only after I had totally finished reading it in the wee hours of the morning. I cried, I laughed.The angle--widowed husbands, whose wives died of cancer, with young kids--was unique. I had never thought about it until I read the book. And what perspectives from all the fathers! It opened my eyes. I had gone through many, many similar things but to hear it from a father's viewpoint was something else. I am excited and I hope that there are many more support groups such as these all over the world.Drs. Rosenstein and Yopp explained and weaved together research, education (whether it was about Viktor Frankl, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, the Dual Process Model of Bereavement and the many other modalities) into the storytelling in context. It was naturally and seamlessly done. It was just beautiful. I learned so much!The stories told of each father really touched my heart to the core. It was obviously excruciatingly difficult reading about the wives' stories but that was part of knowing each father. The tone of the book was respectful and compassionate, each person was allowed to speak with his own voice, and I appreciated the way the authors let the fathers control the group. The authors never butted in, never lectured to them, admitted when they did not know something.....with such humility.I hope and pray this book goes all over the world because it is much needed by ANYONE who has lost a loved one. Hats off to both the authors!!!

I lost my wife over two years ago and am raising three sons alone. What makes this book stand out for me is that it covers the unique challenges faced by widowed fathers of young children .After the loss of my wife, I read many good books about grief and loss but found it difficult to find books that touched on widowed fathers with young children. I was able to relate to many of the challenges faced by these men. The story narrative style of the book makes it so easy to read and the flow is excellent. I liked how they cover the scientific/research side of things, but also kept that part light. I could really relate to the men. My heart could actually feel the heaviness of that first meeting held by the men in that room. While reading the book, it gave me a sense of comfort that I’m not the only one going through many of the trials these men describe. Even though I have not met any of them, I felt a sense of camaraderie with them. The year that my wife passed away, I attended some of meetings of widowed fathers (not with the original group) held by the authors and found them very encouraging. I found the authors, Dr. Rosenstein and Dr. Yopp, to be very compassionate and caring. And I'm grateful to these men who were willing to open up and share their grief journey to encourage other men such as myself.

I lost my wife to cancer 17 months ago and this book was recommended to me by my support group. I'm not a book reader by any means (i used to always say I'll just wait till the movie comes out) but I read it cover to cover in 1 week and loved the book! When I was told of the book I couldn't get over how much of a connection I had with it. My wife died of cancer, this book is about wives who died of cancer. It talks about challenges raising kids and managing the household as a solo parent and that's exactly my situation. And to top it off, one of the men in the book is even named "Dan"! The book kept me engaged the entire time, was a very easy read, gave great insight into what each of the men were about and what they were dealing with and was very helpful for me. I'm so glad it was recommended to me and I'm so glad I read it. Even the separate videos that were made afterwards and available online were very helpful too. Overall it was well worth it for me and very helpful in dealing with my grief. Thank you to the authors for starting the group and writing the book.

I could relate to each of the men’s stories and felt both compassion and gratitude for their willingness to publicly share a devastating loss.